Mary & Drew

Homemade granola

2012-01-12T11:20:00.001-06:00

With cereal being as expensive as it is, and most cereal containing things you don't want in your breakfast (attention vegetarians: Mini-Wheats contain gelatin), I decided to start making granola again.

I'd made it in the past but it was just okay. Today I found a recipe from Alton Brown that is really good. I changed it up a bit, but here's the original:

Ingredients

3 cups rolled oats
1 cup slivered almonds
1 cup cashews
3/4 cup shredded sweet coconut
1/4 cup plus 2 tablespoons dark brown sugar
1/4 cup plus 2 tablespoons maple syrup
1/4 cup vegetable oil
3/4 teaspoon salt
1 cup raisins

Directions

Preheat oven to 250 degrees F.

In a large bowl, combine the oats, nuts, coconut, and brown sugar.
In a separate bowl, combine maple syrup, oil, and salt. Combine both mixtures and pour onto 2 sheet pans. Cook for 1 hour and 15 minutes, stirring every 15 minutes to achieve an even color.
Remove from oven and transfer into a large bowl. Add raisins and mix until evenly distributed.

The changes I made:

I used coconut oil instead of vegetable oil
I used chopped walnuts instead of almonds
I omitted cashews
I added about 1/2 cup finely diced apple, with peels
I used dried cranberries instead of raisins
(You can DEFINITELY use only 1/8 + 1 TBSP or so of sugar, especially if you're using apples and especially if you'd rather it be more oat-y than sweet. It's not bad either way, I suppose.)
Came out really great, and only took 5 minutes plus cooking time.

Cytotec - JUST SAY NO.

2012-01-11T19:47:00.008-06:00

The following is from an article by Dr. Marsden Wagner, author of the fantastic book Born in the USA: How a Broken Maternity System Must Be Fixed to Put Women and Children First.

Without adequate testing of Cytotec (misoprostol) for labor induction, obstetricians simply began to use it on their birthing women. They were taking advantage of a huge loophole in our drug regulatory system. Once a drug is approved by the FDA for a specific medical indication and put on the market, there is absolutely nothing to prevent any doctor from using that drug for any indication, in any dose, for any patient he or she chooses. Since the label of the drug contains the indications approved by the FDA, this is called "off-label" use of a drug.
When obstetricians using Cytotec induction are confronted about their willingness to use a drug "off-label," they inevitably answer: "We use drugs off-label all the time." There are several serious problems with this answer. First, in reality, using Cytotec for induction is not "off-label" at all—it is "on-label contraindicated." On the Cytotec label it is explicitly written that this drug is contraindicated for use on pregnant women. Contraindication would not be on the label unless data exist suggesting possible serious risks from such use. "On-label contraindicated" is a whole different level of risk-taking than a use that is not mentioned one way or the other on the label.

Have you ever looked at the label of a Cytotec bottle? There is a GIANT picture of a pregnant woman with a circle and slash through it. That's the universal symbol for DO NOT. Don't believe me?

The makers of Cytotec have begged - begged OBs to stop using this drug because of frequent catastrophic outcome for mothers and neonates.

Marsden continues: (emphasis mine)

Those doctors and midwives using Cytotec for induction of labor off-label need to understand that they are taking very big chances with the safety of the women and babies they serve. Just about everyone in the world, after taking a careful look at the scientific evidence, has concluded we don't yet know enough about the risks to be willing to use it. This is illustrated in the following list of organizations that do and do not recommend Cytotec (misoprostol) for labor induction:

Recommends
American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG)

Well whoop dee freakin do. ACOG.

Does not recommend
U.S. Food and Drug Administration
Best scientific opinion—Cochrane Database
Searle (manufacturer of Cytotec)
Society of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists of Canada
British Royal College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists
All obstetric organizations in Scandinavia
FIGO (International Federation of Gynecology and Obstetrics)
World Health Organization
Obstetric organizations and drug regulatory agencies in many other countries

So why do OBs in the US insist on using Cytotec for labor induction knowing its dangers? Well, a dose of Cytotec costs $10. A dose of Pitocin costs $100. You do the math. They are risking the lives of mothers and babies for $90. Read Marsden's entire article here.

As long as surgeons can get away with this, they will. This should shock you. This should enrage you.

Finally, in memory of those who died. Read on for the chilling comments from an online petition to stop this madness. Advice? Get some Kleenex.

Regina L Moran
My daughter was given Cytotec to iduce labor. She was not warned of the adverse effects, from taking it. She now suffers from much pain, Caused but the horricfic pressusure pressure put on her brain from having one long contaction that wouldnt end, with the urge to push. She is on heavy medication for the pain. And her 2 daughters now have a Mom that isnt able to be the mom she was before the second baby was borm. Shortly after giving birth she began to have bad pain. Karie Malformation is asymtomatic, unles something causes too much pressure on the brain. Like the strain of pushing in labor., with a contraction that wont let up. She now needs surgery to fix it.. I pray that that OB's and midwives will not have acces to this drug, that has already caused the deaths of so many mothers, and their baby.

101.
Melba Reimer
I used cytotec in labor, my daughter had a seizure the day after.

139.
Cindy Ellingson
My son died as a result of my uterus literally blowing up during the last phase of pushing.

141.
Scott Ellingson
I held my son in my arms while he was taken off life support, thanks to Cytotec.

153.
Erin Moore
Cytotec almost killed me during labor...

205.
Gwen L Barnett
The drug caused terrible complications for my daughter and could have caused her death

210.
Melanie Anne Harding
My daughter Jessica Nicole Harding ,was left disabled after the use of Cytotec to induce my labor, my labor was TOO quick and caused her to be without oxygen, she died 7months 5days later, due to the damage on her brain, on Christmas Day 2002. I have suffered very badly due to trusting that this drug would be safe to use, instead I have to live with the pain , of one terrible choice, for the rest of my life.

220.
Shen Young
In memory of my daughter Karley who died after I received 3 doses of this horrible drug. I trusted my OB and would never have allowed the use of Cytotec had I known it's fatal side effects.

251.
Melissa Emerine
Due to Cytotec, my uterus completely blew up and tore in all directions. My daughter was thrown into my abdomen and was cut off from oxygen. My beautiful daughter has cerebral palsy and seiures. Cytotec should not be used to induce pregnant women. Cytotec was designed to aid digestion for gastric ulcers. Now this drug has moved on as an "off-label" drug to combine with the RU486 drug to complete abortions. Doctors were lead to believe that this "off-label" drug could aid in ripening a woman's cervix, even though Searle, its manufacturer warned against its use on pregnant women. Cytotec is a political pill that is hard to swallow! Please act now and ban this drug from being used on full term pregant women before we lose yet another beautiful mother and baby.

254.
Kourtney Harper
I watched my wife almost bleed to death after her uterus ruptured. Please stop this!

258.
Rebecca Manning
This drug is dangerous and should never be used for labor induction. My friend almost bled to death due to administration of this drug without being told of the contraindications!!

274.
Chuck Heineman
My wife and daughter both almost died due the use of labor induction drugs

276.
Arlene Matejka
The Birth Story of Emily Faith, Uterine Rupture Survivor http://www.birthlove.com/free/emily_faith.html

297.
ANNE BOYLE
My daughter and granddaughter almost died

301.
Tracy Lynn Hamilton
I was given Cytotec without knowing any of the side effects. Luckily my child and I lived but, my uterus did tear at the lowest segment into my cervix. My OB lied to me and I recently found out and I am very upset. I later found out that a young lady died by the hands of this doctor one week after I gave birth to my daughter, Lauryn. We have GOT to do something about this. Tatia and her daughter died a senseless death and the manufacturer of these drugs and the doctors using these drugs need to be penalized and some form of reprimandation needs to take place. I am so very, very angry! They are taking our rights of empowerment of our birthing plan away for their own benefits. (Doctors) I am sickened by this and these doctors need to lose their lisense as well.

309.
Maia McKinney
She was and still is my best friend and I miss her terribly. She and Zorah were stolen from us.

328.
Mary Brownlow
Friend's uterus ruptured and baby died d/t Cytotec

346.
bertha mear
i believ i was given cytotec i wento the hospital at 10 am by 5pm i hd arupured uteris and a dieing baby was aperfect baby she strangeled on my blood . i lost 3or 4 pints of blood i almost died and the next day my perfect darling child died , because my doctor had a tee time he did not want to miss. i am broken hearted . i came home from the hospital 2 weeks later with empy arms . the nine months i waited for my baby was for nothing i never even got to see herface. empty arms and a broken heart. so uncalled for . i understand the sorrow of all those poor women who have suffered as i have. i hope there is more control over the use of this dangerous drug. God bless allthe broken hearted mothers who have gone thru what i have.

356.
Lisa M. Davis
I to also had a horrible childbirth and way to many intervention, and went into Eclampsia and almost went into acomma, I hope something is doen about all these drug's these use.

373.
Joyce A. Vanselow
I witnessed labor during which this product was utilized and I feel that there is not enough info provided to consumers. In fact this woman was told not to tell anyone or the hospital could be in trouble. This is NOT right. The labor was not helped by using this product either, and ended in Cesarian Section. Breastfeeding could not be initiated, and bonding was not what it could have been. I do not see any advantage in this product's use and in fact felt that it was a detriment ultimately. I am a postpartum doula trainee with CAPPA.

393.
Christy Andrews, CLD, CLE, CHBE
I had uterine hyperstimulation and fetal oxygen deprivation from this tiny pill my nurse promised was "generic Cervadil". How many more women and babies will suffer before the FDA does it's job and protects consumers from unscrupulous use of dangerous drugs?

427.
Jennifer Wrampe
I was given this drug to induce labor because my daughter was "getting to big". This was my first child and I trusted my doctor. He did not tell me about any side effects of this drug. My daughter was born perfectly healthy, but I almost bled to death and had to have a hystorectomy.

479.
Duane J. Brescia
Please do something about this injustice. "Everyone else is using it" is not an excuse. Debilitating and permanent injuries to my wife with a previous UNSCARRED uterus.

509.
Kelly Fisk
Cytotec was the first step on my road to a C Section!

574.
Melissa Harley CD(DONA), LCCE
I was given this drug for the birth of my son in 1999. I had no idea of anything negative associated with this drug. This drug caused hyper stimulation of the uterus and I thought that I was going to die because of the unbearable pain. I'm thankful for our health, but angry that this drug was used without proper testing/approval.

631.
Hansi Holloway
In memory of my son Ronald Andrew Holloway born 2/2/2005 and died on 2/9/2005 after I was given Cytotec to induce my labor but was NOT told or warned in ANY way. GOD bless those of us who have suffered at the hands of vigilantly medical provides. Andrew’s website is www.thecloudwalker.net/and
rew

645.
Erin M. Freiberg
One of my friends was forced to have an emergency hysterectomy after amniotic fluid embollism as a result of cytotec. She nearly died in labor. This drug should be banned for use in the induction of live births.

694.
Sheri Dabney
In 2002 I was given Cytotec to induce labor and ended up nearly dying. I had to have an emergency hysterectomy and spent several days in the ICU. This was my first child and I was only 26. I am thankful everyday that my son was born healthy! The diagnosis was amniotic fluid embolism, but I was not told that Cytotec was most likely the culprit.

701.
Mrs Susan Pottberg
My niece had a ruptured uterus from this medication, and had to have a hysterectomy after delivering her son by an emergency c-section. We were lucky we didn't loose both of them during this emergency! Because of this, they can't have any more children!

706.
liz froneberger, rn
a friend of mine required over 25 units of blood after getting this medication -- she and the baby almost died.

747.
Donna Hamlin
The doctors gave us none to very little hope, after my sister was life flighted to another hospital to treat her critical condition from the effects of having her labor induced with Cytotec - it is tragic and most often than not - FATAL !!

754.
Tina Robinson
my baby died 3 weeks ago because of this drug. I almost died too. I had a uterine rupture.

763.
Kendra Shaw
I was given cytotec and almost lost my baby and my life.

767.
Denise Rick
My son had a hemmorage in his brain due to Cytotec

823.
shante powders
A personal friend lost baby due to this drug

1671.
Jacqueline Martinez
My child died in result of a cervical ripening agent. He was a beautiful, 9# and 5ounces. Had a good strong heartbeat up until the cervical was given.

1692.
Gina Dockery
My nephew has Cerebral Palsy due to the use of Cytotec to induce labor

1723.
Kellee Wolfe
I suffered a severe uterine rupture had to have an emergency hysterectomy and almost died. I didn't know the side effect of this drug when given. Thank God my baby is healthy.

1820.
Pamela Carman
My grandson died because of Cytotec. I nearly lost my daughter as well. The attending physician never told my daughter that he was giving her this dangerous drug. After my grandson was delivered brain dead, the doctor remained quiet about the part he played in this tragedy. We learned, after it was too late, about Cytotec and the part it played in Andrew's death. It was months later that we learned, to our surprise and horror, that doctors can use a drug any way they want to once the drug has been approved by the FDA for some other purpose. Had my daughter been informed of what she was being given, and the possible consequences, she would never have taken Cytotec and our grandson would be alive today.

1843.
Misty Ann Prescott
I lost my precious baby at 2wks in 2005 after a cytotec induction gone wrong I nearly lost my own life.

1880.
Chesnye Steward
I was given this with my son in 2001. We almost lost him and had many months of health issues related to this drug. I was not informed about ANY side effects.

1890.
Jennifer Ligman
I never would have allowed the use of Cytotec to induce my labor, had I known all the risks associated with it. This drug led me to get a hysterectomy after the birth of my only child, a stillborn daughter. I am only 25 years old.

1914.
christie smith
harmed by Cytotec

1915.
Miranda Gray-Burlingame
I had AFE after receiving cytotec in 2002.

1922.
Russell Paul
Just lost my grandaughter due to hyper stimulation caused by cytotec.

1924.
Janet Kervick
in 2006 I was unknowingly given Cytotec during labor and nearly died.

1932.
Mark Litkowski
My wife died 1 hour after giving birth 4 Nov 2004

1941.
Marti Runkwitz
I was induced with 2 doses of cytotec in conjunction with cervadil and experienced uterine rupture. My son was without oxygen for 7 minutes and has cerebral palsy. I was told I must have had a congenital defect...you can draw your own conclusions. I sincerely hope this never happens to another mother and child.

1958.
Debby Thompson
My friend just lost her baby girl to cytotec, she almost died and spent a week in hospital fighting for her life. She can no longer have children.

963.
Torie Myers
An extremely high dosage of Cytotec was administered without my knowledge and informed consent. As a result my baby was aborted and I could have died as well.

2002.
Tara L. Morris
My sister died April 22, 2008 from an amniotic fluid embolism after receiving Cytotec. Her name was Wendy Bassett and she was a beautiful person.

1968.
Jenne Alderks
Its the gross misuse of Cytotec that inspired my poem "I Came Out with A Baby" (http://descentintomotherhood.blogspot.com/2008/02/i-came-out-with-baby.html) where modern maternity care is compared to a Nazi Germany concentration camp. Tragically, Tatia and her sweet baby did not leave the hospital alive. I pray that misuse will be stopped.

1996.
Jen Ambrico-Boyce
i was given this drug and had severe bleeding and blood clots during labor. when asked of why all the bleeding was happening-their reply was-i don't know. my son had aspirated on my blood. he didn't cry-he was limp and dazed. he was quickly taken from me and put in the nicu. he was given antibiotics and hooked up to many machines including an iv.he stayed in the incubator for over 24 hours.he got a little better then got worse.no more food just iv fluids. then he pulled out of it and we could hold him and feed him .they did x-rays of his chest and tests-which we thought to be blood tests to rule out infection .after 3 days we went home -together. this by the way was my fifth baby and my first time ever having cytotec. thank you for letting people share a little something.

1998.
Hope Beisinger
We nearly lost our daughter and granddaughter in 2001 from the misuse of Cytotec. Our daughter was never told of the dangers of using Cytotec for induction of labor. She had Cytotec inserted in her vagina after about five hours into the induction. During the labor process the doctors changed shifts. Her regular doctor came on the scene at that time so that doctor knew of the dangers of Cytotec with uterus surgeries. (The first doc inserted the Cytotec. Our daughter had a tumor removed from the back of her uterus in 1993 and several procedures done to her cervix.) After several hours of very hard labor the delivery began. Our daughter had hard, heavy bleeding with very large blood clots, her uterus ruptured, and her first-born child, a girl, was not breathing! Our granddaughter spent thirteen days in the nic unit hooked up to tubes, wires, and monitors. She came home with a feeding tube and a monitor that would alert us if she stopped breathing. After several months our granddaughter was diagnosed
with Cerebral Palsy and Epilepsy. She was denied oxygen during her birth. She is now six years old and is very beautiful. She has big brown eyes, natural curly blonds hair, and a smile that will melt your heart!

2021.
Tyler White
My wife was given Cytotec to induce labor and had adverse effects from it.

2032.
Paris Cho
cytotec almost killed my friend

2071.
Tara Yvette Potter
I nearly died at Mayo after being dosed most emphatically against my will.

2100.
Dawn Hawthorne
I just had a baby 5 weeks ago. Cytotec caused hyperstimulation causing my baby's heart to drop from down to the 60s. I was given cytotec at 8:45 and delivered at 10:00 and was scheduled for an emergency c-section but delivered to quick. How can we stop the use of this drug to induce labor. Please do something quickly before more babies and women die. Please Please Please!!!!!!!

2102.
Margaret Ostervold
When I was induced 8 months ago for "post-date", I was asked to sign a blanket consent for induction prior. I had NO IDEA that the drug I was being induced with was being used not just "off-label", but actually "against-label"! I would have NEVER consented to administration of a drug that specifically states that it is not to be used for induction. I had contractions coming too quick and my baby was having heart rate problems with decelleration. I was horrified to learn the facts about misoprostol 6 months after it was used on me, and I am very thankful that my baby girl and I are both ok. I am so sorry for those who were not so lucky. Please do something to end the against label use of this ulcer drug."

My 4 year old drew this. It's a shark eating a bird.

2012-01-03T11:39:00.000-06:00

Saints of the Year

2011-12-29T08:06:00.001-06:00

I "drew" saints for 2012 with the random saint generator. I just clicked "Get a Saint" and then prayed a few short prayers and then clicked "Show me my saint."

This year, Mary got St. Catherine of Bologna (patron of artists), Joe got St. Gerard (yesssssss), I got St. Isador the Farmer, and Drew got St. George.

I think Catherine of Bologna is invoked against the death of parents and Isador against the death of children.

Good Lord, I hope the Mayans weren't on to something. :)

If you do this on this page, please post which saints you get in the comments box. I'm always interested to hear the stories.

Today Show vid

2011-12-22T15:30:00.003-06:00

Giving it Back from Mike Leonard on Vimeo.

Our upcoming TV appearance.

2011-12-20T17:29:00.001-06:00

First there was the Beatles on Ed Sullivan, then the last episode of M*A*S*H, and now we're going to be in a piece on the Today Show Wednesday morning.

The Today Show's Mike Leonard, executive producer of the Catholicism with Fr. Barron series which aired on PBS and EWTN, came to interview us about our big money find recently. I do *not* like attention and I do *not* like the sound of my voice, but we liked Mike so much that it was like talking to an old friend. I mean, we really like him. We had a grand old time laughing and noshing and talking about being Catholic. He's a funny, kind, extremely down to earth person. I don't like snobs. Not even a little bit. This is a guy who is completely and utterly genuine.
I don't watch the Today Show so I had no idea who he was but soon after we began emailing back and forth, I realized he had produced Catholicism and I told him how much I enjoyed what little I had been able to see (we don't have cable), how much we enjoy Fr. Barron, and how I looked forward to one day catching the entire thing on EWTN. Naturally, he brought me the entire DVD set when he came to interview us. Awesomeness.
You should buy Catholicism on Amazon but if you can't afford that, his book The Ride of Our Lives is significantly more affordable and had me laughing so hard I was crying in the very first chapter. And that's pretty hard to do.

Mike is a gifted storyteller and this is a story he told us while he was visiting. It's the story of how he got the engagement ring for his wife and it is all sorts of awesome and romantic.

Mike Leonard :: The Ring Story from Picture Show on Vimeo.

Ready to play in the snow.

2011-12-20T16:30:00.000-06:00

The busy world.

2011-12-16T19:28:00.003-06:00

I post this video because our Sunday bulletin mentioned it.
If you are one of the four people on the planet who don't know the story, a year or so back the Washington Post positioned violin virtuoso Joshua Bell (with his kajillion dollar Stradivarius) in a DC Metro station, where he played for 45 minutes. The "test" was to see how many people would stop to enjoy the man's music. Only seven people stopped for a bit. 1,070 people were too busy on a workday morning to give even a few seconds to a man making some mighty beautiful music. The previous night, Bell had played to a sold-out house and commanded hundreds of dollars per ticket. Bell reported that there was just one group of people who consistently wanted to stop, tugging toward him and looking back as they were rushed by: little children.
It irks me greatly that so many youngsters, recognizing such awesome beauty in a place where they probably don't see it much, were ignored and prodded on by their frantic parents.
When your small child is tugging you toward something like Bach (which humans innately love), follow them. The parents who stopped with their children that morning taught their kids something.
So did the parents who rushed by without so much as a glance toward one of the finest musicians in the world.

Catholicism: The Series

2011-11-26T11:53:00.001-06:00

This 10 episode series is so good.
It airs on PBS (abridged) and EWTN (complete) every so often, and is also available for purchase.
Fr. Barron is exceedingly likeable and knowledgeable.
I enjoyed it from start to finish.

The $23,800 test: They passed with honors

2011-11-12T13:08:00.000-06:00

We made our way into the Tribune

The $23,800 test: They passed with honors

According to Mary...

2011-11-10T11:17:00.000-06:00

This alligator's eye popped out of his head when he saw the T. Rex.
(You know how in cartoons when they get scared their eyes pop out?)

Tile

2011-11-10T11:14:00.001-06:00

Found this mosaic tile online at cooltiles.com for less than $4 for a 12.5 x 12.5 square with mesh backing.
It's 100% recycled glass and I think it's really pretty.

Here is a color called "Fog." I'm thinking about this color for a backsplash, one day.

Updates

2011-11-10T07:16:00.001-06:00

My sister Mary is coming to Chicago tomorrow!
She's the Bob Vila of the family and we are going to get a few projects done. I'd like to finish painting the basement. Eventually I want to lay some stick on tile down there because that old brown asbestos tile is gross.

I bought a new-to-me sofa on Craigslist because as nice as yellow and green print is, it's killing my eyes to look at the sofas we've been using. (Previous owners left them for us, on our request.)
The owner lives in a condo in Sandburg Village (which sounds like a retirement community but it's actually a very tony part of town) but she hardly ever stays there. She bought the sofa in early 2011 and has barely used it.
It's a Macy's "Blake" sofa. Macy's is pretty well-known in Mid Century Modern fan circles as having a really nice selection of that style. No poofiness in the Macy's furniture department. Clean lines, tufted cushions, chrome feet. As a giant bonus, Macy's furniture is exceptionally affordable. Hundreds of people leave four and five star reviews on their sofas, most of which only cost $599 or so. I got a great deal on the sofa, which is a discontinued item.

You can see it here - it's three or four sofas down. I like some of the other ones better but her definition of "affordable" and mine are vastly different.

A while back, we bought a great Ikea Varde cabinet on Craigslist (Varde is their line of freestanding cabinets) to use as an island. It's this one.

It has a butcher block top. It was crazy heavy and it is a PITA to drive across town, take something like that down 3 flights of stairs, fit it in the van, which had to have the seats removed for that purpose, take it home, unload it, and bring it in. Dummy me, I just found a guy on Yelp who owns a local move/small move/in town delivery company where HE will bring you stuff you buy! He's picking up my sofa (from the 11th floor. I am not kidding) and bringing it across town to me for $65. Can you believe that? Wish I would have known about him when I bought the cabinet. Anyway...
Because it's meant to be used as a cabinet against a wall, the back of it is just plain white. I bought some really pretty aqua mosaic tile to fix that. See what these people did?

This is what I'm talking about. Joe also thinks it would be nice to use some of the same tile or a variation thereof for a backsplash. The aluminum looking tile backsplash we have now IS really fab, but it's outlived its use, I think. Hard to keep clean, some spots are damaged.

A writer from the Trib interviewed me about my money find and the story is going to run soon. She was very sweet and a fellow Southerner and come to find out she's the woman who wrote the "Use Sunscreen" song from the 90s. The lyrics were originally a column in the Trib. I remember the 90s well, and I'm thinking she must be a gazillionaire from royalties. Couldn't turn on the radio to ANY station without hearing that back in the day. It was a very catchy and fun and feel-good little ditty.
Anyway, we talked and laughed and made fun of the Chicago accent and I hope she doesn't make me sound like a total idiot. I mean, I hope I didn't sound like a total idiot. Wouldn't be her fault.

Kids are up. Off to begin the day.

Drew's new haircut

2011-11-01T15:10:00.001-05:00

posted from Bloggeroid

Mary's Halloween costume

2011-10-31T18:39:00.002-05:00

posted from Bloggeroid

The Big Move

2011-10-23T10:59:00.000-05:00

A week ago today, we moved into a new house!

It's an adorable little Cape Cod built in 1940. We are the third owners, after the people who had it built and the family we bought it from. They moved in in 1949.

It needs work! We had to order all new windows because the existing ones were original and not energy efficient, to say the least. The window guy quoted $11,000 for 14 new windows installed. I told him I'd pay $250 a month for 18 months with $1000 down and he made a phone call and approved it. So we got the windows for $5500.

We had to have the inside painted, because I don't like white walls except in hospitals. The first two guys quotes $1500 and $2000 respectively. Uh, no. I found a really great guy for a LOT cheaper (much less than half) and he also had great ideas for the rest of the house issues.

There was still orange shag carpet (not tacked down, just being used as a rug) in the basement. I'm pretty sure it had been there since, ohhhh, 1949 or so and I don't think I have to tell you it was gross.

The electric is still from Way Back When, and 60 amps of power just isn't enough for 2011 and all its Magic Bullets and Ninjas and Toastmasters.

We are having carpet installed because it would have been more expensive to have the hardwood floors refinished, and frankly, I am tired of hardwood. It makes your feet hurt, it makes bare feet feel dirty unless you mop constantly, which you cannot do with Drew DeGreif living with you, and it makes for sore noggins and butts when your kids fall, which mine do routinely. We went with top of the line Mohawk Smartstrand, which was used in a rhino pen for 2 weeks and then cleaned with just hot water - and it was still brilliant white. The carpet is made from 37% renewable resources and has built in stain resistance in the fibers, which means the stain resistance can never wash off or fade like Scotchgard. It's also the softest carpet you can find, so it's all-around pretty perfect. It was a LOT less money than I thought it would be and I can't wait to get it. You should have seen the kids stomping all over the samples of carpet. They thought it was the coolest thing.

There was faux wood paneling in the kitchen and actual wood paneling in the basement. The painter painted the kitchen and it looks AMAZING. It's like a new room - so bright and cheery now. The basement paneling hasn't been painted yet but that will be soon. I thought about pickling it since the wood is really pretty, but whatever. I'm just going to prime it, slap on some paint (probably white, maybe yellow) and be done with it.

We need a new washer and dryer and there are a couple of places I've found for scratch and dent or display item stuff. One is Refurbking.com and the other is Pecca Wholesale. They both have great prices for display appliances.

Other than that, the boxes stacked in the basement go to show how much crap people have that they can actually live without. I wish I could just chuck it all.

I wanted to keep the vintage feel of the house, which we did with the bright, cheery paint colors (1950s, woo! No more wars! Everything was bright and colorful.) and the vintage chrome outlet covers, art deco door hardware, etc. It's like the previous owner decorated in 1949 and never did again. To me, this house has a very, very special feel which would be diminished with new, trendy things. Granite counters? No thank you. Formica all day.

From the time I first stepped foot inside, it felt homey. I was talking to the previous owner's sons (they moved in when the youngest was Drew's age - he's now retired and living in KC. The other one is a retired Chicago cop) I mentioned that they must have had a lot of good times inside. They were both pretty emotional at closing, which made me emotional. I promised I'd take good care of their mother's house.

The movers came last week and moved all our stuff in. Joe asked them to take the thousand pound Zenith Color! TV outside to the alley and they did. I asked Joe if he wanted them to move the mattress and box springs (They left almost all the furniture when they sold. Pretty awesome, for the most part.) from Mrs. D's room and he said, no, we could do that later. They left and Joe went down into the basement to work. I was organizing upstairs and decided I could move the mattress on my own.

When I pulled the mattress off her bed, I saw a blue bag. I knew immediately what it was. I moved the mattress outside and came back in and opened the bag.

I found $23000 inside.

From the "Pregnancy is not a disease" file.

2011-10-10T08:34:00.003-05:00

Chicago Tribune: Woman gives birth after running (and walking) marathon

You.

Go.

Girl.

Dear world:

2011-10-02T14:13:00.000-05:00

MOTHERS deliver babies.

Doctors, passersby, bus drivers, paramedics, and flight attendants sometimes ASSIST at the delivery of a baby.

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/deliver

Carry on.

My girl

2011-10-02T13:13:00.000-05:00

Cheese

2011-10-01T15:13:00.000-05:00

Pics

2011-10-01T15:11:00.000-05:00

Can't wait for Halloween!

Playground fun.

Mary and Cousin Emma

Drew and Grandma

Helping Uncle Joe play ukulele.

A rare moment of truce.

Wednesday Drew

2011-08-24T16:23:00.001-05:00

posted from Bloggeroid

Drew gets a haircut

2011-08-19T16:02:00.001-05:00

posted from Bloggeroid

Mary colors better than I do.

2011-08-11T09:36:00.000-05:00

More dancing

2011-08-10T16:57:00.002-05:00

Drew dancing

2011-08-10T16:57:00.001-05:00

2011-08-03T07:50:00.001-05:00

Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

2011-08-03T07:49:00.001-05:00

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drew dancin

2011-08-03T07:48:00.001-05:00

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On "stuff."

2011-07-25T13:21:00.001-05:00

We had 7" of rain in a few hours a few nights ago. Naturally, the basement flooded and we lost quite a few things.

Among the things that are not salvageable are hundreds of photos, Mary's ultrasound pictures, precious books including the last book my dad gave me, and the guest book from my wedding, which doesn't bother me except that Dad wrote something funny in it.

Of course, I was melancholy. I mean, no one likes to see irreplaceable mementos in the garbage can. It made me even more melancholy to see our entire alley filled with other peoples' boxes, furniture, books, and mementos.

People expressed sympathy, which is of course the right and polite thing to do.

No one would ever call me a sentimentalist, and maybe I purposely make myself that way. At any rate, I do not get attached to things, and I'm glad. What good does it do to obsess over the loss of a thing? We have no time machine to change the past. I could obsess about a book or a signature, but why? It's gone. What no flood can take is the knowledge that my dad loved me very much.

A minor flood is hardly cause for gnashing of teeth. When I posted on Facebook about the flood, a friend of mine responded how sorry he was, and then proceeded to tell me how his grandmother and two aunts had lost everything in Hurricane Katrina, and that his aunts were never even allowed to return home. They salvaged a handful of pictures, but that was literally all that remained of their life before the storm.

How dreadful to lose such a large part of your life.

And yet, there were people who lost not just their families' possessions but their actual families in Katrina.
There are mothers in Haiti making their children dirt cakes just to fill their stomachs and stop their constant crying from hunger. There is always, always someone worse off.

No matter what is taken from you, after the dust settles, it's a good idea to remember to give thanks for how very much we (especially we Westerners) have, and to pray for those who have nothing. Think you're having a bad day? Every 3.6 seconds a human being dies from starvation. 75% of those human beings are children. Perspective: I lost some books.

Empathy can go a long way towards alleviating attachment to things.

What I Want My Adopted Child To Know

2011-07-16T17:45:00.002-05:00

Some people say they don't understand how a mother can place her child for adoption. They say they don't understand how a mother can entrust her child to someone else, knowing she may never see that child again. I don't believe them. I think they do understand. I think they understand exactly the wrenching, searing pain of not being able to take care of your own child. I think they understand exactly the visceral fear of not being enough. I think they understand exactly the terms of sacrifice adoption requires. I think they are awed and humbled by your birth mother's decision, and they doubt they have courage enough to do what she did. I'm almost certain I don't.

Sally Bacchetta, What I Want My Adopted Child to Know

Mary art

2011-07-12T12:34:00.002-05:00

Mary drew a picture of a bird making me some coffee :-)

Summer fun with the roller skates and bathing suit Aunt Janet sent!

2011-07-12T10:11:00.000-05:00

The kids

2011-07-09T20:37:00.001-05:00

Summer fun

2011-06-30T14:51:00.001-05:00

2011-06-17T19:48:00.001-05:00

2011-06-15T17:12:00.001-05:00

Shut up, dear. We're just fixing the mistake God made when he gave you that vile thing.

2011-06-02T13:04:00.002-05:00

A blogger takes her hubby for a surprise visit to the doctor in order to save him from being mocked in the locker room at Gold's Gym.
Or something like that.

Read all about it!

"Mary, Mother of Jesus" movie

2011-05-17T10:01:00.000-05:00

I am not a fan of schlock and schmaltz, especially not that of the religious variety.

I don't like "Christian rock", not even a little bit. I don't like statues of Jesus helping children play baseball, or of Coca-Cola's Santa Claus kneeling at the creche. I am not morally opposed to them. I just find them cornball. I don't like mixing the divine with the everyday, and that's what those things are.

You can imagine that "Religious" is not my favorite movie genre.

This morning I watched "Mary, Mother of Jesus" and I was pleasantly surprised.
First, it stars Christian Bale as adult Jesus, so even if the rest of the movie was terrible, it wouldn't have been a total waste.

You don't see too many movies about Mary, and oftentimes when she's portrayed, she's soaking in protestant theology. This movie didn't do that. Even during the Nativity scene, when most movies derail from Catholic theology, you get the distinct impression she's not in pain so much as she is awestruck and unsure of what's coming next.

This Mary is beautiful, humble, and obedient, of course, but she's also strong. Her courage and fidelity are highlighted throughout. (And let's face it - her entire life from the Annunciation on was a giant exercise in those two things.) It's easy to remember the beautiful and pure and graceful and demure Mary. It's easy to forget that The First Christian was surely one of the bravest people to ever live.

This movie is refreshingly short on the typical bright light/swelling music thing other films use to drive home the point that He was dead, y'all! And now He's alive! Right, we got that. Furthermore, I'm pretty sure that being as how Mary Magdalene talked to Jesus at the tomb for a few minutes before she realized that she was talking to Christ (and Jesus even had to call her by name to get her to realize), He didn't look like the Sun and have an orchestral soundtrack around Him.

Just about my only issue with this movie was how old Mary looked when the Jesus was 12 and beyond.
She was only 14 or so when he was born, so when he was 12, she was still in her 20s. She doesn't look elderly in this movie by any means, but in an effort to "age" Mary, movies often go overboard. But that's a tiny irritation. It was quite an enjoyable film.

Netflix has it.

Pictures!

2011-05-16T11:54:00.000-05:00

2011-05-14T19:47:00.001-05:00

Happy birthday Drew!

2011-05-14T14:11:00.001-05:00

That was NOT a review of Nurtureshock.

2011-05-10T09:55:00.000-05:00

Don't get me wrong, I agree with a lot of what the woman said. (See my previous post.)

But what she said has nothing to do with the book. I didn't know that at first - now I only have a couple more chapters to go in the book and I can say with certainty Nurtureshock has nothing to do with playdates or video games or any of that.

The book completely debunks the flawed-from-the-get-go study about self-esteem from twenty years ago or so which put us on the path to where we are now - to where a school in MA has kids jump rope (wait for it) without jump ropes to avoid someone falling and hurting their precious self-esteem.

Study after study has now shown that telling a kid he is "smart" versus telling him he "must have worked really hard" or "really concentrated" is detrimental to the child and causes lower test scores and ultimately lower self-esteem.

The books cites many studies on lying and we learn that telling kids about Geo. Washington and the cherry tree results in less lying but telling them about The Boy Who Cried Wolf causes INCREASED lying.

A chapter is devoted to fights among siblings.

A chapter is devoted to race. We find out why kids in more diverse schools tend to segregate MORE and why it's important to approach the race issue head-on.

A chapter is devoted to the ridiculous ways schools test for "gifted" and why it's a completely flawed system.

This is not a parenting manual - it's a book about child psychology more than anything.

And it's fantastic!

Review of Nurtureshock

2011-05-07T19:36:00.007-05:00

(Updated for clarity)

This is a part of a review of the book Nurtureshock, which I will be downloading to my Kindle when I go up to bed tonight.

While there are many improvements for life as a kid today - like car seats and really cool playground equipment - a lot of things are downright stressful and disappointing. Here is a top ten list of things I personally can't stand as a modern American parent:

1.Playdates.
2.Endless "after school activities" that eliminate dinner altogether
3.Uggs, Beatles Guitar Hero and cell phones for 9 year-olds

4.The lack of freedom for kids to ride bikes all over town for fun

5.No paper routes or lawn mowing or weed pulling for extra cash

6.No more "Come Home When the Streetlights Are On" neighborhood standards

7.Fighting constantly to "downshift" our family routine.

8.Having to serve macaroni & cheese or pizza at every kid gathering

9.Texting instead of using the spoken word to communicate

10. 8% of kids walking to school today vs. over 75% when I was a kid.

What has HAPPENED to us as parents? We bought into the notion that the world is a very scary place, when it is safer than ever. Toddlers are strapped down with every safety device known to man just to get out and learn to rollerskate or ride a bike, and all of their recreational time is carefully planned and monitored from the moment they can crawl.

My feelings on the list?

1. I will never, ever use the term "playdate" except in jest. I have some friends with kids, and occasionally they will come to my house or I to theirs and we will bring our respective children. But the point of us getting together is never, ever our children getting together. All adult social functions that children attend will end up with the children playing together, bank on it. But to me, calling it a "playdate" implies that the function and focus of it all was the chiiiiildren. Not so, not in this house. I love and enjoy my friends' company. I like their kids too, don't get me wrong. But I invite them over because I want to see my friends. The kids are just a bonus. I think adults today are ashamed of admitting that their entire waking existence doesn't revolve around their progeny. By calling "Happy Hour" or "Coffee Break" a playdate, maybe they feel less guilty about actually wanting to discuss something other than children. Words matter, as they say in charm school. Next time, try this experiment: "Do you want to get together for lunch/margaritas/coffee tomorrow?"

2. Hate this. It's been pretty well exposed over the last decade or so, so I think more parents are aware of "overscheduling" and the problems it creates. If Tommy's soccer game and Julie's piano lessons mean you don't ever eat dinner together, well then: Dinr - u r doin' it wrong, as those cute little LOLcats might say.

3. I get her point. It's about materialism, not about Uggs (which are, I understand, some of the best cold-weather boots out there) or video games or cell phones. However, I would not like my husband to go anywhere without his cellphone and I don't want my kids to either. Not their iPhone, or their Droid --- just some piece of technology they can use to contact me. Have you seen a phone booth lately? Thought not.

4. I rode my bike all over town one night. It was great, though I wouldn't recommend it for unsupervised children. Seriously, there are some places where your child has no business riding her bike without you. Chicago is probably one of those places. (NO, not because of stranger danger. Because of traffic. It's insane.)

5. I can't wait til my kids are old enough to mow the lawn. For money? Bwahahahahahahahahhaha!
Oh, and grownups in minivans have now cornered the market on paper delivery. Not that paper delivery will exist when my kids are teenagers.

6. I have mixed feelings on this. I don't have kids of this age, so I can admit that I literally have no idea how all that works. I'm all for them being out of the house. Running loose in Chicago? Not so much.

7. Not gonna happen here. We stay pretty much downshifted. Again, that could change with older kids, but I hope not.

8. Feed your kid "Kid Food" and guess what they're going to end up liking? Now, I'm a red-blooded American and I like pizza and I sort of like macaroni and cheese but I vowed to not feed the kids "Kid Food" 24/7 when they were born. Mary, because she has been raised on variety and "You don't have to eat it but you have to try it", likes goat cheese, avocado, unsweetened Greek yogurt, hummus, asparagus - real food as well as Kid Food. Joe and I try to have positive food conversations. Joe no longer "hates" goat cheese. He "doesn't prefer" goat cheese. And Mary thinks they sell balloons inside McDonalds. (I have no idea why.)*

9. This is a societal problem, not a parenting problem.

10. A LOT of kids I know walk to school. I know even more who walk to the bus stop or train stop and take public transportation to their schools. And that's public transportation that lets you off a half mile or so from your school. But in cities and towns with no sidewalks or no safe route (due to violence or traffic) - it ain't happening. This is an urban planning problem or a breakdown of society problem, not a parenting problem.

*By the way, before I get accused of being a killjoy, I have nothing against fun food. Nothing at all. We have chased the ice cream truck down more than once this year, and it's only May. I have no intention of stopping. My biggest problem with McD's is not their food, but their business practices. But a McD's cheeseburger can be a great treat for a kid. It probably shouldn't, however, be the food they most associate with dinner.We just don't care for it, so we don't go there. There is entirely too much good food in Chicago to waste calories on a Big Mac.

READ THE ARTICLE

On Western "Attachment Parenting"

2011-05-07T19:05:00.000-05:00

Jean Liedloff lived in South America with a tribe of Stone Age Indians for over two years.
The tribe practiced attachment parenting (a term which I absolutely loathe) to the max.
Yet they had no screeching toddlers, no whining six year olds. Not ever.
How did they do it?

Writes Liedloff:

There is a Yequana expression equivalent to "Boys will be boys"; it has a positive connotation, however, and refers to the boys' high spirits as they run about and whoop and swim in the river or play Yequana badminton (a noncompetitive game in which all players keep the cornhusk shuttlecock in the air as long as possible by batting it with open hands). I heard many shouts and much laughter when the boys played outdoors, yet the moment they were inside the huts, they lowered their voices to maintain the reigning quiet. They never interrupted an adult conversation. In fact, they rarely spoke at all in the company of adults, confining themselves to listening and performing little services such as passing around food or drink.

Far from being disciplined or suppressed into compliant behavior, these little angels are relaxed and cheerful. And they grow up to be happy, confident, cooperative adults!

How do they do it? What do the Yequana know about human nature that we do not? What can we do to attain non-adversarial relationships with our children in toddlerhood, or later if they have got off to a bad start?

Read the article.

We have a new Princess courtesy of Mary

2011-05-04T17:46:00.001-05:00

My sleepy little girl

2011-04-29T18:14:00.001-05:00

The Reverend Know-It-All rants about modern weddings.

2011-04-28T10:01:00.003-05:00

And much hilarity ensues. I love this priest. (For those who don't know, he is not only witty and astute, he is a very holy and kind priest.)

Read The Wedding Rant Here.

Royals Week continues here at M&D

2011-04-28T08:03:00.000-05:00

And it was thereby further enacted, that all and every person and persons that then were, or afterwards should be reconciled to, or shall hold communion with the see or Church of Rome, or should profess the popish religion, or marry a papist, should be excluded, and are by that Act made for ever incapable to inherit, possess, or enjoy the Crown and government of this realm, and Ireland, and the dominions thereunto belonging, or any part of the same, or to have, use, or exercise any regal power, authority, or jurisdiction within the same: and in all and every such case and cases the people of these realms shall be and are thereby absolved of their allegiance: and that the said Crown and government shall from time to time descend to and be enjoyed by such person or persons, being Protestants, as should have inherited and enjoyed the same, in case the said person or persons, so reconciled, holding communion, professing or marrying, as aforesaid, were naturally dead.

- From the Settlement Act, enacted 1701 and still the law of the land today. Prince Michael of Kent and George Windsor had to give up their place in the line of succession when they married Catholics in 1978 and 1988 respectively.

Guy Fawkes

2011-04-27T19:21:00.000-05:00

His signature before and after being tortured:

Dear Royal Family.

2011-04-27T07:48:00.000-05:00

I think it's just great that they're finally getting married.
I think they really love each other and I wish them a long and fruitful marriage.

Now, if you'll just give us back all those churches you stole while martyring monks, including the stolen church they're getting married in, that'd be grand.

Bath time fun

2011-04-23T19:10:00.001-05:00

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Drew is walking!

2011-04-21T21:25:00.001-05:00

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Damn you autocorrect

2011-04-11T09:05:00.000-05:00

I don't know if you have ever been to the site "Damn You, Autocorrect" but it's hilarious. People post their texts which autocorrect "corrected" for them with funny results.
Example:

Dad: Mom and I are going to divorce in August.

Son: WHAT??? WHY??? CALL ME!!!!

Dad: DISNEY. We're going to DISNEY.

So, this morning:

Mary M: I had a dream we were walking by a ballpark and saw Ted Bigamy.

Me: WHO?

Mary M: Nugent. Ted Nugent. Damn iPhone.

Prayers!

2011-04-09T11:54:00.000-05:00

In your charity, spare a prayer for Tiffany and her baby boy.
She is only 24 weeks and the docs are trying to stop pre-term labor.

Where to get St. Gerard miscellany

2011-04-09T11:14:00.000-05:00

If you need a hanky, novena, or medal, contact the National Shrine of St. Gerard at St. Lucy Parish in Newark.

Here is the parish contact info.

And as God is my witness, I WILL get to this shrine one day for the big Feast Day celebration.
Zeppoles, y'all!

Saint Name Generator

2011-04-07T19:39:00.002-05:00

I prayed for a patron saint for this blog and clicked.

St. Teresa of Avila.

I'd like to think it's because she's the patron of "people ridiculed for their piety."

Alas, I'm sure it's because she's the patron of "people in need of grace."

Nice hat!

2011-04-07T19:25:00.001-05:00

Gerard Majella

2011-04-07T17:11:00.000-05:00

    I don't remember where I first learned about St. Gerard. Somewhere along the path of my return to Catholicism, I read about him and was intrigued.

    In 1753, a young woman in Gerard's village accused him of being the father of her unborn child. Gerard offered no defense, and St. Alphonsus understandingly assumed Gerard to be guilty. The young saint was sentenced to confinement at the monastery and was forbidden to receive Holy Communion. Can you imagine? Gerard's only statement on the matter was, "There is a God in Heaven. He will prevail." A few months later, the young woman confessed that she had fabricated the story. (And St. Alphonsus probably felt this low.)

     The most famous story of Gerard is the "handkerchief story." Once, while visiting a family in the village, St. Gerard dropped his handkerchief. One of the young girls of the household ran after him and tried to return the cloth. "Keep it," St. Gerard told her. "One day it will be of service to you." The young girl had no idea what this meant, but years later, while effectively dying in childbirth, she asked for the hankie. Immediately, she was healed and delivered a healthy baby.

   There is a little church in Italy where candles and letters and telegrams surround an image of St. Gerard. The telegrams and letters vary by language, but they all convey the same happy news:

Baby boy, mother and child fine.

Baby girl, alive and well! Praise God.

Baby Gerard born today. Mother and child well.

     I heard of a parish in NY where you could get a free handkerchief with Gerard's image and his famous words "Here God's will is done as God wills for as long as God wills." I sent off for a handkerchief back in 2006. I received it, along with a card from the parish assuring me of their prayers and requesting to hear about the "good news" when it happened. Overly confident, no?

      I also started a Novena to St. Gerard that we would be able to become parents. I was just three days into my novena when I found out about a crisis pregnancy, the pregnancy that would lead me to our Mary. What began as a true crisis and a source of much grief and sorrow when I first learned of the pregnancy became the great joy of my life. I attribute the conversion of heart of Mary's birthmom directly to St. Gerard and Our Lady of Guadalupe, both of whom I begged like I had never begged for anything before to save the life of this child, whom I already loved. I don't suppose I will ever forget lying in bed sobbing, thinking about this little one twisting and turning and jumping for joy (Yes, if you've ever been privileged to see an ultrasound of an 10 week old unborn child, you are quite aware that they can suck their thumbs, stretch, play with their hands, etc.), oblivious to the imminent danger. I mean, I prayed constantly, and so did a LOT of other people. I will never forget feeling surrounded by prayers and love and I will never forget cautiously feeling that our prayers had indeed been answered. For the millionth time, thank you, Lord.

     Naturally, I became intensely attached to "the little saint of happy delivery." It was as though for the first time ever, I felt that the Communion of Saints was not some faraway, unreachable group of perfect people. I felt like I had a friend there.

     In August of 2009, I went to the parish picnic. My mom and I were sitting at a table when a friend from church approached and said, "Can I ask a personal question?" I said sure and she said, "Is there something about you and Joe and a new baby?"

     I was kind of wistful, because days before, we'd been at Millennium Park and Mary was playing with another little girl when Joe remarked that she "needed a sister." I totally agreed, but we just couldn't afford another adoption and after so long, it looked like pregnancy would never happen either.

     Of course, I just laughed and said, "Nope! Can't afford it and I'm certainly not pregnant." I raised my glass of beer as proof. She was insistent. "Are you sure? No adoption in the works? No pregnancy?" I laughed again and reiterated that yeah, no.

     She then said, "I was praying for you and your husband the other night and I saw you with a new baby." I was touched that she had been praying for us. She insisted. "Seriously, you were holding a new baby." Again, I said no and as she walked away, Mom and I looked at each other and kind of giggled. "Well. She was interesting," was Mom's comment.

     I knew what my mother was implying, but she didn't know the woman like I did. (And frankly, I didn't know her terribly well.) I just mumbled something like, "She's special, Mom. She has the faith of a little child. You kind of have to know her."

     A week and a half later, I took a test and lo and behold, it was positive. I'm convinced God loves surprising us.

     Again I found comfort in my old friend. Again I started his novena. I was terrified of miscarriage due to my age and due to the fact that it was such an unexpected thing. (And due to the fact that I drank about 2 bottles of champagne at the Millennium Park thing. It was Beethoven 9, the hap-hap-happiest symphony in the history of man. Sue me.)

     I ended up having the easiest, most delightful pregnancy ever. Oh, don't hate me. The delivery was hell. (And I would do it again a thousand times, for the record.)

     So to say I like spreading the word about St. Gerard would be an understatement.

     Recently, a friend of mine who suffers from PCOS and a host of other ailments had surgery in hopes of healing to the point of becoming fertile. She was only a couple of weeks post-surgery, and it's not unheard of that pregnancy won't occur for a year or more following the procedure. It's major surgery and the human body needs months to heal from such a thing.

     I suggested we start a novena to St. Gerard while she was healing. She agreed, and a couple of our friends joined us. A few days after the novena ended, she took a pregnancy test. Of course, it was positive. She took another and another. Positive. Positive!

     We were giddy. Unlikely, improbable, inconceivable! (Pun intended. And you know you read that in Vizzini's voice.)

     Because she'd had problems, she immediately had to go have bloodwork done. She was nervous, but I told her not to worry, because her baby was one of "Gerard's babies", as they're known. When her hcg level was tested, it was at the abysmal level of just 7. Lower than five is not even considered pregnant. This was scary, because OTC pregnancy tests detect hcg levels of 25 as a rule. You can't get a more sensitive one than that at a place like Walgreens. She had obviously had a level of at least 25 just days before. Now, the level was 7. And the only time an hcg level drops is when you're miscarrying. We prayed and prayed, and I tried to reassure her even as I was terrified for her.

     The next day, she had blood drawn again. If the number wasn't at least doubling every day, it was an indication of miscarriage. On the morning the new numbers were to come back, we were chatting. I went to the Saint Name Generator on a whim and prayed for a saint to protect her baby. When St. Anthony of Padua came up, I smiled, because she had told me before that she was VERY devoted to him. I emailed her what had happened. She was delighted, if perhaps leaning a bit towards a coincidence. Still, I wondered where Gerard was, and I figured two saints are better than one, and I was so nervous....so I clicked to get ANOTHER saint.

When the name Gerard Majella appeared on my computer screen, I almost fainted.

     I immediately emailed her, and with tears in my eyes, wrote her what had just happened.

     And then she blew my mind.

     She was freaking out like I was. She was bawling. "What you don't know," she wrote me, "is that last night, my husband and I were discussing naming the baby Anthony Gerard if it's a boy."

     It was at this point I knew that her baby was just fine. And when the number came back, it hadn't just doubled. It had TRIPLED. We spent the next few hours in complete awe.

     A friend of hers, a friend I do not know, was having similar problems and had a similar surgery. My friend suggested we do a novena to Gerard for her friend. Naturally, her friend became pregnant a few days after we finished the novena.

     I still have friends suffering from infertility. I still have loved ones who die of cancer. Being human, I still know pain and sorrow. Novenas are not magic. Prayer is not superstition. As a matter of fact, during that novena, we were also praying for another couple who still wait for their child. But there are miracles all around us, and you can see them if you look with the eyes of faith. And if you ask the Communion of Saints to intercede at the throne of God for you, they will. Children are not granted to the worthy. In a million years, I am not worthy of the motherhood of the two little souls I am raising. That's not some false humility. That's not a pious line. That's the 100% honest truth. I know that. I will never understand why I was given these children. I am eternally grateful, but I know not why.

     I do know that if it will not serve to help you or others achieve heaven, the answer to a prayer will be no or, at least, "Not yet." We can only see a sliver of the picture. It's like looking through a keyhole. Our perception is flawed. We don't know why some things we ask for which seem so good and right are denied us in this life. We do know that everything bad, all the dead babies and wars and infertility and abuse and poverty and hopelessness - all that is caused by the fall of man. And we trust that sometimes we just don't know what's right for us, what our plan is.

     And that is why even prayers for motherhood - such a worthy and noble request - should always end with "Here God's will is done, as God wills, for as long as God wills."

I am so grateful I'm Catholic, not just for Holy Communion, Confession, and the biggies like that, but also for the Catholic intimacy with the Communion of Saints.

Friends in high places, that's what that is.

Happy birthday St. Gerard!

2011-04-06T16:20:00.001-05:00

More about HIM later!
Suffice it to say, we're like THIS.

This.

2011-03-31T13:50:00.003-05:00

I would vote for Bach, all of Bach, streamed out into space over and over again. We would be bragging, of course, but it is surely excusable to put the best possible face on at the beginning of such an acquaintance. We can tell the harder truths later.

-Famed biologist Lewis Thomas, when asked for his suggestion about what Earthlings should broadcast into space in hopes of contacting alien life

Join the Chicago Chorale (totally appropriate motto: "Seriously sublime.") as they sing Bach's masterpiece "Mass in B Minor" Sunday April 3rd at 3PM in the Rockefeller Chapel at the University of Chicago.

Oh, and speaking of books...

2011-03-29T18:57:00.000-05:00

I didn't necessarily mean to give up Facebook for Lent, but I did intend to spend much less time on the internet. It was frying my brain and taking time away from things of much more importance.

Since I've put my mind to it and stopped logging on out of boredom (no different than eating or boozing out of boredom), I've been able to rediscover my love of reading. I'm making a concerted effort to pay attention, really pay attention to the words I'm reading, and it's been oh so nice.
(I finished Frankenstein last night.)

This is an old article, but I found myself nodding in agreement as I scanned it.
(Yep. I could only manage to scan it. Nice, huh? Not as if it's War and Peace.)

Over the past few years I’ve had an uncomfortable sense that someone, or something, has been tinkering with my brain, remapping the neural circuitry, reprogramming the memory. My mind isn’t going—so far as I can tell—but it’s changing. I’m not thinking the way I used to think. I can feel it most strongly when I’m reading. Immersing myself in a book or a lengthy article used to be easy. My mind would get caught up in the narrative or the turns of the argument, and I’d spend hours strolling through long stretches of prose. That’s rarely the case anymore. Now my concentration often starts to drift after two or three pages. I get fidgety, lose the thread, begin looking for something else to do. I feel as if I’m always dragging my wayward brain back to the text. The deep reading that used to come naturally has become a struggle.
I think I know what’s going on. For more than a decade now, I’ve been spending a lot of time online, searching and surfing and sometimes adding to the great databases of the Internet. The Web has been a godsend to me as a writer. Research that once required days in the stacks or periodical rooms of libraries can now be done in minutes. A few Google searches, some quick clicks on hyperlinks, and I’ve got the telltale fact or pithy quote I was after. Even when I’m not working, I’m as likely as not to be foraging in the Web’s info-thickets’reading and writing e-mails, scanning headlines and blog posts, watching videos and listening to podcasts, or just tripping from link to link to link. (Unlike footnotes, to which they’re sometimes likened, hyperlinks don’t merely point to related works; they propel you toward them.)

-Is Google Making Us Stupid?

Book plug

2011-03-29T18:26:00.000-05:00

I just HAVE to plug Peter Hitchens' book The Rage Against God: How Atheism Led Me to Faith.

Peter, brother of famous anti-theist Christopher (who is suffering from advanced esophagal cancer and hasn't long to live - spare a prayer for him) has written a gripping read of his journey from nonbelief to Christianity.
It is honest, raw, and humble.
Throughout it, I keep thinking how much I'd like to have lunch with the author. He comes across as so very genuine.

I just finished the part where Peter sees van der Weyden's The Last Judgment in the hotel in which he was staying in France. Upon seeing the painting's subjects naked and not confined to any one time period by fashion, Peter realizes that faith is present-day and not some dusty bit of antiquity. He sees in the faces of the damned the faces of his contemporaries, his own face. Shaken, he notes that one poor soul is actually vomiting in terror.
Yikes.

A good read, not just for the conversion angle, but Hitchens' stories of growing up in 1950s England, living in Soviet Russia as it collapses, and visiting Mogadishu are gripping on their own.

Amazon description:

Here, for the first time, in his new book The Rage Against God, Peter Hitchens, brother of prominent atheist Christopher Hitchens, chronicles his personal journey through disbelief into a committed Christian faith. With unflinching openness and intellectual honesty, Hitchens describes the personal loss and philosophical curiosity that led him to burn his Bible at prep school and embrace atheism in its place. From there, he traces his experience as a journalist in Soviet Moscow, and the critical observations that left him with more questions than answers, and more despair than hope for how to live a meaningful life. With first-hand insight into the blurring of the line between politics and the Church, Hitchens reveals the reasons why an honest assessment of Atheism cannot sustain disbelief in God. In the process, he provides hope for all believers who, in the words of T. S. Eliot, may discover 'the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started and know the place for the first time.'

Telegraph Review

Amazon Customer Reviews

magic flute

2011-03-28T14:37:00.001-05:00

Mary spent the entire second act asking if she could pick up the feathers on the floor which had dropped off of Papageno's costume. At the end, I let her and the cast was so tickled! Pamina picked her up and they all oooed and ahhhed at how cute she was. We were front row, too! She loved it!

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Sweet little boy

2011-03-18T13:26:00.001-05:00

My (not so) little man

2011-03-08T23:33:00.002-06:00

Drew now weighs 25 pounds and is 28 inches tall!

We actually had to take him out of his infant seat because he is over the weight limit. And Mary is now in a booster seat because she is over the weight and height limit of her old seat.

These darn kids sure are growing fast.....

Silly happy boy, and Mary

2011-03-08T12:01:00.003-06:00

Think Jesus had His prepuce removed? Think again.

2011-03-06T12:03:00.000-06:00

Article by Dr. Momma (www.drmomma.org)

I would encourage anyone who believes they are genitally cutting their infant for religious reasons to dive into the subject further.

"Cutting the Blessing" among the Hebrews in antiquity was done in a MUCH different fashion than in modern U.S. culture where we amputate the entire prepuce organ. Hebrews and early Jews made a very tiny slit in the tip of the prepuce to allow for mere drops of blood to be shed as the blood sacrifice of the covenant.

The Hebrew words used for this practice in the Hebrew Bible (Old Testament) are "namal" and "muwl." Namal means 'to clip' - like one would clip the tips of your fingernails. Muwl means 'to curtail, to blunt.' Neither of these words mean "to cut," "to amputate," "to remove," "to cut off," etc. There were very different Hebrew words with clearly understood meanings representing 'the cutting off' or 'the removal of' something. The difference was plainly obviously to those practicing and writing about the practice at the time.

At this time in antiquity, we could not possibly amputate the prepuce organ (as circumcision is done today) and expect the child to live! Even in the 21st century we suffer from a 1-in-3 rate of complications due to prepuce amputation. At this early time in human history, babies would have hemorrhaged from the complete cutting off of the prepuce, and in rare cases when they lived through the blood loss, they would have died of surgical site infection and disease (something we commonly find today despite our sterile environments and understanding of wound infection).

Side Note: I have been working recently on a compilation of paintings from antiquity representing Jesus as a baby. Jesus (born to Jewish parents) would likely have been 'circumcised' on his 8th day of life. Again, this means a tiny slit would have been made in the end of his prepuce to allow for the shedding drops of blood as a part of the covenant his parents had with YHVH (Yahweh). When we (with our modern, Western eyes and presumptions about circumcision) pour over these paintings of a naked baby Jesus, it would appear that he was always painted as INTACT. Why? Because the prepuce was NOT removed. It was not amputated. It was never 'cut off'.

Ancient peoples never dreamed of doing away with a God-created organ that was so useful, so important. The prepuce was regarded with such honor that it was thee organ seen as being most GOD-LIKE. Hence the reason it was the organ 'slit' for the blood letting as a sign that "YHVH is the one I follow"...not my own 'god-like' member.

When Jews in antiquity wanted to exercise in the gymnasium (often done in the nude) they had to appear intact. Greeks only allowed intact men to participate in activities there and the rules were strictly adhered to. To do so, Jewish men regularly pulled the prepuce down over the glans (head) of the penis, before going in. There were even little devices made to cover the scar from the slit in the prepuce end so that no one would be the wiser as to their 'circumcision'. None of this would have been possible if the entire prepuce were removed.

There is a lot more to be said on this topic. Completing graduate studies in Human Sexuality, I found it necessary to also complete a corresponding degree in Religion because (as shocking as it may sound) the two subjects go together SO much of the time... We frequently must understand one in order to fully understand the other. When it comes to issues of circumcision in antiquity this is most certainly the case.

Much more recently in American history, we started the prepuce amputation practice in an effort to curtail masturbation among boys and cut down on men's sexual exploits (especially among soldiers overseas during war times). It was in our post-WWII drive to circumcise all boys and men that we first introduced 'circumcision' to the mass society as we now know it today. Even Americans at that time KNEW that removing the prepuce would take away a man's most sensitive and sexual organ.

It is empowering to find that many of the most outspoken intactivists today are Jewish men and women. At the same time, many Jews today are opting instead for a Brit Shalom in place of cutting their perfectly born sons.

Drew-woo

2011-02-24T10:10:00.001-06:00

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What do you want on your tombstone?

2011-02-24T09:44:00.001-06:00

"Prosi O Zdrowas Marya."

Do you know what that means?

"He (she/they) ask(s) for a Hail Mary (from the gravesite visitor)."*

That.
Is
Awesome

(And yes, we gave them one.)

*Edit: After talking to a few Poles, I found that the actual translation is "Please, a Hail Mary."
Even better.

Angel of God, my guardian dear

2011-02-24T09:28:00.000-06:00

Plotting against me, probably.

2011-02-23T17:07:00.000-06:00

Happy boy.

2011-02-23T17:06:00.000-06:00

I wear my sunglasses at night....

2011-02-19T16:14:00.001-06:00

Mary sledding

2011-02-19T13:00:00.003-06:00

bouncy seat

2011-02-16T08:56:00.001-06:00

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Mary can reach the clothes line!

2011-02-03T11:21:00.001-06:00

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side of house

2011-02-03T11:20:00.003-06:00

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side yard

2011-02-03T11:20:00.001-06:00

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after.

2011-02-03T11:05:00.001-06:00

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Before and after.

2011-02-03T10:59:00.000-06:00

New pics.

2011-02-03T10:56:00.000-06:00

Christmas morning - love this one!

bath laughs

2011-02-01T18:38:00.001-06:00

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Mary playing with Drew

2011-01-29T22:58:00.001-06:00

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bath time

2011-01-25T14:10:00.003-06:00

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drew

2011-01-25T14:10:00.001-06:00

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grandma thinks I'm out of this world. (new shirt we bought)

2011-01-25T14:04:00.001-06:00

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Kindle.

2011-01-24T10:33:00.000-06:00

Lots of my friends and coworkers have had Kindles for a long time.
They were always harping on me to get one, it's soooo great, blah blah.
I have to admit, I'm pretty contrary. If everyone has one of something, I don't really want it.
This is especially true if whatever it is is all over pop culture and the news.
Also, I don't want to admit that they were right.
(Very mature, I know.)

Joe started asking if I didn't want a Kindle for Christmas. I was pretty adamant that no, I most certainly did not want a Kindle, the latest toy everyone seemed to have.
He kept telling me about it, how it doesn't cause eyestrain like looking at a computer does because it's not backlit, etc. How the battery lasts forever because the only time the battery is in use is when the page is being "turned" - as soon as the new text is on the page, the battery is no longer being used. I've been a fan of the Gutenberg Project for a long time and I've downloaded lots of free books to my computer and Droid, but it's SO hard to read something that's backlit that I'd never get very far.
Also, I fell into the "I just like holding a book in my hands" trap. "I liiiike holding a book."
"I liiiiike feeling pages."
(Nevermind the fact that books are heavy and cumbersome and you cannot hold one if you have an incorrigible child. They're too heavy to hold even while feeding a child. You really need both hands to hold a paperback and a hardback is just too heavy.)

Finally, I figured, hey, I like electronic toys. Kindle is cheapish. We went ahead and got one.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah~

I love it. I love it so much.

1.) I buy lots of books. Some books are treasures, like Moby Dick and Lord of the Rings and Hobbit and the Douay-Rheims Bible. These books are hardbound and pretty and look nice on my shelf and are fun to sit and read sometimes. But the vast, vast majority of books I buy are "throwaway books" - books I read once or twice and then am done with. Example, looking at my bookshelf:

The Healing Power of Herbs
Herbal Drugstore
The No-Cry Sleep Solution (Oh, don't get me started. Just don't.)

These are books that I read once and will likely never read again. What a waste. A waste of money (they are all hardback), a waste of paper, a waste of the fuel used to bring them to my house. Of COURSE, I could never throw out a book, so they'll end up at Goodwill or somewhere like that, but in the meantime, they are cluttering up my shelf.

Kindle prevents this kind of waste. Think of a book you want, download it instantly, and then delete it if you're done. Or keep it. You can store THOUSANDS of books on a Kindle, and you can organize them: Herb books, Religious books, Parenting books that do not work not even a little bit, etc.

2. Being a child of the 70s, I'm all about instant gratification. I don't WANT to have to order a book from Amazon and then wait two days for it to arrive. And I'm surely not dragging two kids, one of whom is Incorrigible Drew, out to an actual bookstore. With Kindle, it takes about 5 seconds to download any book, ever.

3. The best things in life might not be free, but the best BOOKS in life sure are. The vast majority of books older than, say, forty years, are no longer copyrighted and are therefore free. You can download free books on Amazon, from Gutenberg Project, and from many other sites - right to your Kindle.
Some of the free books I've downloaded:

Confessions, St. Augustine
Summa Theologica, St. Thomas Aquinas
Story of a Soul, St. Therese
Five Jules Verne books, including Around the World in 80 Days and Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea
Two H.G. Wells books that caught my eye
A Compilation of the Messages and Papers of the Presidents (AMAZING!)
Fragments of Ancient Poetry
Twelve Types, G.K. Chesterton
Discipleship, Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Douay-Rheims Bible
Song of Hiawatha
Fairy Tales Every Child Should Know
The Divine Comedy
Treasure Island
Pride and Prejudice

You know that episode of Twilight Zone where Burgess Meredith plays nerdy bank teller Harold Beemis? And his boss and wife are always bitching at him about reading too much? And then one day Harold is in the bank vault working and a nuclear war happens and he's the only guy on earth to survive?
And for a while it's all good - but then he gets lonely and finds a gun shop and gets a pistol and is going to kill himself when he looks up and sees the giant public library?! And he realizes he can just read and read and read for the rest of his life with no harassment! And he's just getting piles and piles of books and organizing them: "I can read these in January, these in February, these in March!"
And it's all going great until poor Harold breaks his glasses and he's pretty much blind as a bat and then he decides to end it all but he can't find the dang gun without his glasses!!!!111!!!

Well, guess what? If Harold had had a Kindle, he could have just pushed one little button and made the font as big as he wanted, even this big or bigger.
And he would have been fine.

Every day with my Kindle, I feel like Harold Beemis after the nuclear war but before he broke his glasses.

The End.

playing with his fire truck

2011-01-21T14:04:00.001-06:00

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eating cornbread

2011-01-18T13:22:00.001-06:00

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Mary and Drew

2011-01-16T17:21:00.001-06:00

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Drew likes watching Mary play Wii.

2011-01-12T11:56:00.001-06:00

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Drew stands

2011-01-08T19:11:00.001-06:00

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Drew standing, sort of

2011-01-08T18:38:00.001-06:00

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Cookies

2011-01-08T17:56:00.001-06:00

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Drew

2011-01-06T19:08:00.001-06:00

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New haircut

2010-12-28T18:31:00.001-06:00

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2010-12-28T18:28:00.001-06:00

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2010-12-28T17:44:00.001-06:00

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2010-12-26T16:53:00.001-06:00

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